Juliana (she/her) & Sean (he/him) have been best friends for more than 4 years. They both describe the other as their healthy mirror and this has helped them grow and evolve to become better versions of themselves through a whole lotta love and trust. Their friendship has had a huge impact on each other's lives and they've played a major role in one another's support system. They walk together through thick and thin and they know how to have a good laugh along the way.
Transcript
0:03
Do your best impression of me.
0:07
Um.
0:09
We're going to get some Whole Foods,
0:11
and rolls, and it´s just jarring.
0:15
It's just jarring?
0:17
You always say jarring for some reason.
0:20
There's one word that I always like
0:24
That was a terrible impression, by the way.
0:26
It was awful.
0:27
I just feel like mine would be like, “Dude!”
0:33
That´s so true! - Yeah.
0:35
If for some reason I lost all of my memory,
0:37
what is the first thing you'd tell me about us?
0:42
I don't know why, but I thought of this.
0:44
That we have a friendship tattoo kind of.
0:47
Oh my go, yeah!
0:48
It'd be cool to say that, just so it's like
0:52
we have a tattoo of each other, like,
0:54
we're supposed to be in each other´s life forever.
0:56
Yeah.
0:57
Um,
0:59
I would say that
1:01
We're each other's healthy mirror.
1:04
Mm.
1:05
Like, we...
1:08
Yeah.
1:09
That, like, our friendship is very
1:12
healthy. And like,
1:14
Like our friendship is a good place to kind of like, touch base.
1:17
Mm. Yes.
1:19
I think I would say something along those lines, too.
1:21
But I would say like, this is like a safe place.
1:23
Yeah, I would say that too.
1:24
To got just... - Like, whatever.
1:27
Throw it out there, you know?
1:29
Be open. - Yeah.
1:30
Yeah. - Yeah, I feel the same way.
1:32
This is a safe place.
1:33
This is like a,
1:34
This is a good place to just
1:36
Not be judged.
1:37
Yeah, yeah.
1:39
I agree.
1:40
Okay.
1:40
All right.
1:45
Okay.
1:46
Damn!
1:47
Uh, okay.
1:48
Describe the first moment you realized you could fully trust me.
1:53
Mhm. Wow.
1:55
I don't know if I can remember that.
1:57
You know, you know what's coming to mind though?
1:59
Like just straight away, is
2:01
that I remember the first time you read my writing.
2:04
and your reflection back to me was like, so beautiful.
2:08
Like it, like it was exactly what I would want to hear
2:12
from someone that read what you read.
2:15
Beacuse you were like, it was like, “I know you”,
2:19
And then you just came aliv... like it was like you in, like, full color.
2:22
Yeah. - When you read it.
2:24
And I remember that because that's obviously,
2:26
you know, it's like writing is vulnerable,
2:28
especially what I write about.
2:29
So it was like “Oh, okay.”
2:31
Like this is a good person to, to share these things with.
2:36
Like, I can share anything with you,
2:38
Nice. - You know?
2:39
And because it was, it was
2:42
it was a way of knowing you, like
2:46
fully, through your writing.
2:48
Because there was always some very mysterious side of you.
2:52
Mhm.
2:53
You know, like, there's something, more than mysterious.
2:55
You kept to yourself.
2:57
So for me,
2:59
you know, you opened up in a way where I was like,
3:03
“oh, good”, like “my secrets are also okay”
3:06
to be told.
3:07
You know, like, - Mhm. Yeah.
3:08
If you opened up so vulnerably,
3:10
writing that, and you trusted me to read that.
3:15
Yeah.
3:15
For me, it was also like,
3:17
I have deep, dark secrets and they're not weird.
3:20
Mm.
3:21
Yeah.
3:21
And, and I can share with somebody that would totally understand this.
3:27
What do you feel connects us?
3:32
I mean,
3:34
there's so many.
3:36
Our...our childhood?
3:39
Mm-hm.
3:41
Like that, that place, that safe space in our minds
3:46
when we were kids.
3:48
Because so much stuff was going on on the outside,
3:51
that we made this, like,
3:53
amazing world in our heads
3:54
to protect ourselves from what was happening.
3:57
Emotionally, specifically.
3:59
Like,
4:00
I really
4:02
feel like that, I feel like that connects us a lot.
4:07
Obviously, the thing that we talk about all the time is how we go through
4:13
parallel things in our lives.
4:15
Totally.
4:16
Like, I, Often at the same time.
4:17
Often at the same time.
4:19
We're like,
4:20
“this is happening with a person”,
4:21
I'm like, “this is happening with a person for me!”, like,
4:23
I feel like the synchronicities
4:25
that we go through in our lives in a parallel way.
4:28
I think I told you this once,
4:29
I feel like God was like,
4:32
you know, let's give them, let's give them, like, company,
4:35
so they don´t have to go through it, - Right.
4:37
They can go through it alone, but they can have somebody else
4:40
to go through it as well, to understand each other.
4:43
Yeah.
4:44
Yeah, I feel like at this point, I'm pretty much taking it for granted.
4:47
Like, if we, like, meet up for dinner,
4:49
and I haven't seen you in a couple of weeks,
4:51
Like, you will have been on a similar ride as me,
4:54
and then we can compare notes.
4:56
Yeah.
4:56
You know?
4:57
Yeah, that's what we do.
5:00
When do you worry for me the most and why?
5:05
Oh, God.
5:07
Oh, God!
5:11
I think anytime, like,
5:14
and then I'm sensitive to this because I'm similar.
5:18
I think that,
5:19
I think that when I see you get, like, really
5:22
excited about an opportunity.
5:24
Yeah. And I feel like I don't,
5:26
I don't know anything about this opportunity, right?
5:29
So I don't know if it's like,
5:30
I don't know what's happening,
5:33
but sometimes I'm like “Oh, shit!”
5:36
But I get it! I get it why you´d be worried.
5:39
I so get it! - Yeah.
5:40
I mean,
5:42
that's the thing, that's the healthy mirror.
5:43
You know, like there's a part of me that thinks that.
5:46
That is like, - Well, totally.
5:47
is it healthy to be this excited about an opportunity?
5:50
But I think to fully fleshed that out,
5:53
when I, when I worry is like,
5:56
I hope she's like in her center on this.
6:00
Yeah.
6:00
You know what I'm saying?
6:01
Yeah.
6:01
Like, I think I feel protective of you.
6:04
Yeah.
6:05
I, this comes up when we talk about,
6:07
when we talk about relationships too.
6:08
When I hear you talk about, “Oh, my God, I met this guy”,
6:11
I'm like, “Oh, I don't know”,
6:13
“I don't know about this guy”.
6:15
Maybe that's what I am. I'm like, the healthy brother.
6:18
Yeah!
6:19
You know?
6:20
Oh, shit, I don´t want to talk crap about my brothers.
6:22
No, no, no, no, no.
6:23
Sorry. Sorry, brothers.
6:24
I didn't mean like.
6:25
I didn't mean like, I'm, like, healthy and they´re unhealthy.
6:27
I just mean, like, - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
6:28
You know what I'm saying? - No, no, no!
6:29
Maybe I am a healthy brother... - Emotionally
6:31
You are the emotional support.
6:34
You know? - Yeah, yeah.
6:35
Definitely.
6:36
Because that's how I feel.
6:37
Like when,
6:38
and I'm sure you feel the same.
6:39
I mean, I don't want to put words in your mouth,
6:41
I'm sure you feel the same.
6:42
I mean, - It´s exactly what I wanted to say!
6:43
For four years, you probably, like,
6:45
every time I'm like, “Hey, I met this woman”,
6:47
You're like, “Oh, great. She's sound really...”
6:49
Mmmm, really?
6:51
“she sounds great!” - How many times have I heard
6:53
“I´m goin to marry her”.
6:54
And I'm like, “Mm-hm”.
6:56
That's funny.
6:57
Yeah.
6:57
Yeah, but I think I,
6:59
to turn it back around, when I worry about you the most
7:01
I guess is in those, like moments of euphoria as well.
7:06
what's a pain in me you wish you could heal?
7:08
Oh, gosh.
7:11
Yeah, that,
7:13
Oh!
7:15
Oh!
7:17
That deep pain you go through when that breakup happenes.
7:21
I wish you could, too.
7:23
Can you do it now? - Oh, my God!
7:25
I wish I could have, like a, like,
7:27
Like, just fish it out of there somehow.
7:30
I also understand you so much, because i think
7:32
that's also my defense mechanism.
7:34
You turtle up on it, and then
7:37
you come out to the world, and then you talk about it like “I'm okay!”
7:40
I know.
7:41
And it's like...
7:42
you are so, like, I admire that of you so much.
7:45
Like, you know, your boundaries.
7:47
You know, when you're, like, “guys bye.”
7:51
Like, “I´m out”.
7:52
More than, more than making a joke of it.
7:54
The fact that you can... like, it's also like,
7:57
“I need the ocean, I´m going to go surfing”.
8:00
You know, like,
8:01
you take care of yourself in a way that has inspired me a hundred percent.
8:05
Mm, thanks.
8:06
Because you really, you really know where like,
8:10
“I'll lose it if I don't do this”.
8:13
And that's pretty awesome.
8:16
What's one experience you wish I never had?
8:20
Wow.
8:26
That's funny.
8:27
What´s one experience that I wish that you never had.
8:31
That's a hard one, because I feel like your,
8:33
Your, these traumatic experiences that you've had in the past
8:36
have really shaped you and formed your life,
8:38
and have been like gifts in their own way. Right?
8:40
And I feel the same way for you.
8:41
And I know that you've sort of like, that's how you hold it.
8:44
So to tell you that I wish that that didn't happen to you seems strange.
8:49
You know what?
8:50
I can come up with something here.
8:51
Okay.
8:53
I was going to say, like, I wish that you felt like, um,
8:58
Like more taken care of in your family.
9:02
Or like, more like people were looking out for you more.
9:05
Emotionally.
9:06
Yeah. Yeah. Emotionally taken care of.
9:08
But again, I understand that was part of your process.
9:11
That's the thing. - Yeah.
9:13
I mean, I understand why. - Yeah
9:15
In the grand scheme of things.
9:17
Yeah.
9:17
And they did shape me to be the person that I am.
9:21
To have the friendship that I have with you.
9:22
Yeah, that's true.
9:24
Period.
9:25
Why am I in your life?
9:28
Um.
9:30
Because you're my healthy mirror.
9:31
Okay.
9:32
what in your relationship are you most grateful for?
9:36
Fun. Laughter.
9:38
Because you, you remind me that I don't have to be so serious.
9:41
Yeah.
9:42
Cause I'm so f***ing serious.
9:45
And I think even honestly, like, our friendship has just
9:48
has allowed me to relax in certain ways.
9:51
You know, like,
9:52
You just, you like give me shit for being stiff, you know, like, so,
9:57
like with the leaving thing, like, that is actually self-care, by the way.
10:01
Like, like having a time limit - I know!
10:03
that I'm going to stay in a place because I get exhausted.
10:06
But I love the fact
10:07
that you were the one that was like, “he's got a f***ing time limit”
10:10
You know, like you were the one that called me out for that.
10:13
Yeah.
10:13
And honestly, I, there was something about the environment
10:16
we were in, that people were trying to give you,
10:19
like they were like,
10:21
they were trying to be like, “Oh but why are you leaving?”
10:22
Yeah, the guilt.
10:23
They were trying to guilt you. Exactly.
10:25
So I guess that's why I was so giving you shit in a way, cause I was like
10:29
Sure.
10:29
Guys, he has an expression like, let it go.
10:31
Yeah.
10:32
Like, it was more of like,
10:34
“Poeple, you take care of your own f***ing business, he needs to leave”,
10:37
almost. You know? - Yeah, sure.
10:39
Almost very big sister of me trying to take care of you, if anything.
10:43
Yeah, Yeah,
10:45
Do you think your life would be different if we never met?
10:48
Do you think you'd have a different outlook on life?
10:50
F*** yes!
10:51
Easy. - Easy.
10:52
I agree. - Okay.
10:54
If there were,
10:55
If this were to be our last conversation,
10:57
what´s one thing you would never want to me to forget?
11:01
That I love you.
11:02
I love you too.
11:05
Hey there.
11:06
Thanks so much for watching.
11:07
If you enjoyed that conversation,
11:08
and you want to ask these questions to your own friends,